Sometimes the discoveries in cancer research can be so great and hopeful. And fun to manipulate in my mind. You know, bend it to fit my personal experience. Like this news about one of my favoritist antioxidants. I've been conducting my own unscientific, protocol-less, uncontrolled, completely unblinded and absolutely anecdotal study of red wine and its effects on chemotherapy for YEARS. My carefully evaluated findings clearly show that red wine totally enhances the effects of chemotherapy leading to longer term survival. However, if Dr. Okunieff manages to get funded for additional studies of red wine and its fabulous ingredient, resveratrol, I will be first in line to participate in his trial. That's right; I have no problem sacrificing myself in the name of scientific discovery. I'm that selfless.
But, wait! There is also this. Is the treatment for my disease not cruel and grueling enough? Does it not sufficiently deprive and detract from my existence? I've surrendered my thick and shiny hair (multiple times, I remind you), my manicured and well-kept finger and toe nails, my self-defining energy, my rather hot bod (shut up, you), and occasionally the contents of my stomach to fight this disease. But, fast for two days before treatment? Now you go too far, cancer! You go way. too. far.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to scarf down some french fries and red wine. Oh, and chocolate. Can't forget the chocolate.