Wednesday, September 3, 2008

I'm Not Dead Yet

While the initial news I got from my scans had me feeling encouraged, a thorough read through of the reports myself, combined with the way I've been feeling lately (bronchitis, right, that's ALL it is) shows that the disease while:
  • non-evident in my bones and liver,
  • regressing in my brain -- with no new involvement,
  • regressing around my collar bone where I had CyberKnife,
  • previously identified met in left lung is stable,
  • and effusions in my lungs are regressing --
the nodes in my chest we have been watching have apparently had a growth spurt. To the point where my airway is being restricted, and I feel I am being asphyxiated. I can't handle more than a few steps before gasping for air and going into a coughing fit. It is beyond frustrating, and might I add, f-ing scary when it feels as if someone is smothering you.

I ran up to My Oncologist yesterday, he sent me to a specialist in tomotherapy today, and I start a 15-day course of treatment to some highly irritating nodes tomorrow. Unbelievable! I am thrilled (but still terribly winded) and so blessed to have this physician on my side. He knows me so well and the depth of my commitment to this fight. So while My Love and I drove home from the tomotherapy center, all I could do is smile and think of this (which you can jump 45 seconds into to finally get to the meat):